12.01.2003

Oh why am I writing when all I've been doing is sitting in front of this computer? Perhaps because here am I free to make spelling mistakes and use swear words and talk about poo. I love you all for that.

Took one of my anti-stress pills on Saturday night. First one I've had all term. Why haven't I done this before? It was lovely and I'm now actually getting work done instead of just staring at books and thinking about how I'm going to fail.

I went to see Chuck D give a speech on Tuesday night. It was really good, thought it did go on for 4 hours. He has a great way of expressing himself - "your minds are the modern real estate" so he wanted us to keep our own minds. He also made some comments about the word "nigger" - he does not believe in the re-appropration of that word. It is negative and no one should have the liscence to use it positively. And he also made an interesting point about the death of the black man having always been profitable in American society - they make them money in jail and rap star make the studios more money dead then alive. He was way more eloquent than that, but I'm a little fried right now.

Adam's play, The Laramie Project, was fabulous. Really talented actors and a really moving performance. Sold out two nights in a row. They had a space in the foyer where people could right comments and this one girl wrote "I love this world too much to let it stay the same" - that and queer theory and all the other signs in my life have led me to volunteer my time to yet another committee, but this one is off campus thank fuck: The Gay, Lesbian, and Bi Association. I also wanted to volunteer for the youth programme, but these kids are pretty fucked up and I think they need to talk to people who have also been judged and persecuted for their sexuality. I can't tell them I know how it feels cuz I don't. But I'll see, maybe I can help them out a bit. The only place I've ever experienced any sort of judgement is at the university actually - in the class where we discussed Queer Theory, I brought in my very humourous Lesbianism Made Easy book and a few girls actually said "disgusting" as it was passed around. Other comments were made, I don't feel like reproducing them. So, even in my hick town of Kelowna there are more open minded people than this class of MA students. Anyway, I've always wanted to expand people's minds about sexuality and I figure this is a good place to start. I start in January woo hoo!

who cares whose arms i'm wrapped up in
who cares whose eyes i see myself in
who cares who i dream of
who cares who i love
'cause in the end it only matters
that I was loved
and am loved
love has no face
-Randi Driscoll

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